by Charles Hurt 21 Apr 2015
Madam Candidate of the People was in her magical mystery conversion van, flying over the cornfields of Iowa taking enemy fire. This required evasive maneuvers that launched her coterie of handmaidens, purse-holders, and security guards all around the plush leather cabin of the magical, age-reversing van.
Heroically, Madam Candidate of the People finally landed in war-torn Iowa and dodged down the runway, pocked with mortar-blown craters. The master sorceress of disappearing emails and reappearing Rose Law Firm records then switched her magical mystery conversion van from flying mode to driving mode.
Without regard for her own safety or self-respect, Madam Candidate of the People then embarked on a tour of the malnourished and impoverished urchins of the squalid state of Iowa.
Before arriving in Iowa, she and her handmaiden Huma, donning dark sunglasses, had gone undercover in an Ohio Chipotle, understanding that this was supposed to be very popular with The People. She ordered something called a burrito bowl, also popular among The People, especially the Mexican-oriented ones that are most highly valuable to anyone in Madam Candidate of the People’s present line of work. Read more at breitbart.com.
